I had strange dreams last night, but that doesn’t surprise me. Here are two of my theories on why:
- I over-ate a variety of delicious, rich foods last night–a representation of the abundance in my life.
- I slept without my sweetie, Nick, for the first time in several days — a necessity to make room (not only physically, but morally) for my out-of-town family visitors, including my father.
But what did surprise me, was the serendipitous thought I had when I woke this morning. It began with, “I LOVE him.” That thought was followed by:
- “That’s why it didn’t feel right not spending Thanksgiving with him.” — Nick are I are being very cautious with this relationship. Our most recent relationships (marriages) happened too quickly, and in the end, simply wasn’t right for either of us. So, we’re proceeding slowly and with caution. We give each other plenty of space and don’t insist on spending too much time together, though the temptation is there for both of us. As a result, we gave each other “space” yesterday for the holiday, and pretty much insisted (in a loving way) that each of us spend it with our families, and not feel rushed trying to get over to visit with the other’s family. Though not having to rush around did add a sense of tranquility, it was like a part of me was missing. This morning’s thought made me wonder if we’re trying too hard to give each other space. (Funny thing is, this also creates a bit of “imbalance.” Probably 75% of the time we do spend together is in bed. The other 25% is doing “couple” things.) Hey…no complaints here. Just a thought.
- “That’s why it’s been difficult to write posts for Serendipity of Sex.” — I love to blog, and have three other blogs in my “other world.” But for some reason, I’ve felt a bit “stuck” with this blog, even though its topic is central in my life right now. This morning, I realized it’s that “LOVE” thing. In my “past life” thoughts of love, and the sex associated with it, are a very intimate thing, to be shared between two people. It feels a little strange to share it on the World Wide Web, even anonymously, and I think I’ve tried to become a different person to do it. But now, I’ve decided to write it as me. If I’m uncomfortable sharing something, I’ll let you know I’m uncomfortable. Because I want to share it. There’s so much to learn from sex, and I’ve learned a lot about myself already.
So, here we go. I’ll try to write a bit several times a week, not just about the sex, but about the transitions Nick and I experience through it. That’s been the purpose of this blog all along. And I’m thankful for that.